The Reasons I’ve Been Away
It has been 1,011 days since my last blog post, and there has been a world of change. Like many people, I have have had my share of struggles including issues surrounding my mental health, a divorce, being a survivor from an abusive relationship and a move across the country. You know… small things. So as I sit here in the hospital where my mother is having surgery, as a distraction from my worry, I find myself reflecting on my renewed passion for writing and being creative with my style, my love of travel and getting back to it all. In fact, I would say it is even stronger than before.
In truth, I was always a bit reserved in the past, writing about things that were inspiring to me but… weren’t actually me or my life. I now know that without honesty and risk, vulnerability and trust in my readers… what’s the point?
Putting yourself out there is scary and I wasn’t brave enough to do it or fully commit to in the past. With all the initiatives encouraging open discussion and dialog surrounding mental health and the support that exists from peers online who are going through the same thing, I’ve found my strength. It’s an internal strength first, but I know I am able to lean on you for support simply by sharing my story.
So here I am, baring it all and feeling amazing doing so (if not a little scared). I am finally in a place where I can get back to what I love, which is writing, trying my best to look stylish and sharing my experiences travelling as well as a slew of new things I can’t wait to share with you. Through intense therapy, fitness, and the love and support of my incredible family and friends, I am able to come to you today as a new, whole man, ready for my next adventure.
So thank you for sticking around to my online friends, welcome back if you took some time away much like I did, and “Hello” if this is the first time you’ve been to my site.
Those returning will see that I’ve changed the name of my site and branding. The reasons are many (metamorphosis, growth, lack of pretension), but as I have changed, so too did my brand. I am no longer a style ambassador sitting atop teaching others. I was never that (even though I may have came across like that). In fact, anyone identifying as someone in this way, knows little about what actually goes on and needs to create distance from readers to hide the fact that they’re scared. And I know because that was me.
I’d rather guide by example, because actions are more important than words and I can’t tell you how to feel or what to like. I can show you what I like, who I am and those of you who enjoy it will stick around on this crazy adventure with me.
Today I decided to wear my Mr. Strong tee so I can be strong for my mother, strong for myself, and strong for anyone at all that needs help. If you are dealing with mental health issues or are in a relationship you can’t get out of, I know your struggle and I sympathize. Please know, you can contact me and I will be here to listen. Who knows, I may even have some advice for you that may help, or be in a position to guide you to help.
So to launch my new site. I’m saying.. On Your Mark… you know the rest.
But this isn’t a race, it’s a personal level I encourage you to challenge yourself to achieve. An unseen metric of personal best that you know exists in yourself. Be strong. Be your version of Mr. Strong for you, and the important people in your life. And if you can’t, that’s okay too. Remember there are people in your life that can fill your cup. I’m living proof.
It Gets Better.
Photos by Rhonda Watson