Holy F*ck I’m Sore
Disclaimer: I’m lamenting
I’m ridiculous. My eyes are bigger than my stomach. In my head I’m as fast as a cheetah, reality is closer to a donkey. I also often find myself overwhelmed with jobs I’ve taken on because my capacity is leaner than my will to help people.
This same quality applies to me in the gym. Doesn’t matter how many times I’ve found myself in this position, I make a plan and I hit that treadmill, weights or mat like a pro athlete… which I’m NOT.
Sore is an understatement for the times I’ve overdone it, and today is no exception. “No pain no gain…?” Whoever said that couldn’t have felt like this. I feel like busted collapsing barn
Yes, I’m complaining, but you were warned. The funny thing is, I can’t stop rubbing my sore muscles and making them hurt… it’s as if I don’t really believe that they’re sore so I keep poking them. Am I a masochist? Issues.
I tried to get on this fallen tree and just about killed myself cause my sore legs were too weak to stabilize my lumbering body.
I planned to go to the gym today but F********************CK that.
Okay, so as a repeat offender of inflicting miserable agony to myself, I have a few solutions that help to ease your torture so you don’t gripe to those around you and piss em off.
- Epsom Salt Bath – This actually works! The thing is you need to buy the salts and have them handy and take a bath the night of your workout to minimize pain the next day. Currently in pain? Then try #2.
- Ice Bath – If you are severely sore (like me), then this actually soothes quickly alleviating tenderness and torment.
- Workout – Sound impossible? I feel you. But a good stretch and lifting some weight helps to “push” the lactic acid through your system. I’m not an expert but this always helps me.
- Eat pineapple and Tart Cherries- These probably don’t help… I’m not a dietitian… I googled it… this is probably bullshit but I wanted a #4. But drinking water actually does help so do that.
Then workout more. The tenderness is caused by a build up of lactic acid in your system and the best way to keep those levels low is to work them out.
Take my own advice you say? … Thanks…. dick.
What are your tips to soothing sore muscles?
Photos by Rhonda Watson